Paper round

The voluntary sector can seem like a ceaselessly nagging partner: "don't smoke, eat five a day, exercise, reduce your carbon emissions, care about things". And now Greenpeace thinks you don't get up early enough.

According to The Times, it backed an attempt by Conservative MP Tim Yeo to move the clocks forward by an hour, in line with the rest of Europe. Greenpeace was in favour because less light bulb use means fewer carbon dioxide emissions.

But the Government was not impressed and allowed MPs to talk the private member's bill out.

The entertainment at most new charity launches does not usually include pole dancers in slippery tutus. But the Private Equity Foundation is not the average charity. The £5m attempt by the private equity industry to combat its reputation for asset stripping did not impress The Observer, which questioned whether "lissom dancers" sat well with the charitable impulse. Paul Maloney of the GMB union said of the foundation's plan to donate to children's charities: "It's like Herod becoming a patron of the NSPCC."

A possible explanation comes on Popbitch as to why celebs such as Angelina Jolie are so keen to visit war zones in the developing world. It seems that the bleeding heart humanitarians are hermetically sealed off from the action in camps run by Afex, a company that provides wi-fi, en-suite tents, satellite TV and fully stocked bars. Jolie supports Unicef, an Afex client; others are Save the Children and Oxfam. Are things really so cushy?

Deaf impersonators from eastern Europe are running a charity scam in Manchester, according to the Manchester Evening News. Women with Slavic accents have been collecting money for non-existent charities in the city centre, pretending to be deaf. It's the perfect story for The Sun: bogus asylum seekers, bogus chuggers and bogus deaf people.

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